So question of the week, how do you feel about your body? When I ask this I am not asking about how you think you look physically, but instead how you feel about your body.
A few years ago I was completely disconnected from my body and this question would have baffled me. I had no idea how I felt about myself, apart from the obvious aches and pains. Until one day, I decided to try some alternative therapy for infertility and the therapist told me my stomach area felt very cold. At the time I had no idea what this meant, but felt I was obviously not conceiving due to having a very unwelcoming womb. It took me years to understand what had happened and I am going to share this with you today.
I realised there had been a lifetime of holding my body accountable for things that had happened throughout my life. Starting with a problematic menstrual cycle as a child, this later led to teasing at school from boys. Stage one of self sabotage to my body had begun. I was telling myself I was disgusting and blaming it on my dirty menstrual cycle. Stage two came with the teen years, full of self judgement, was I attractive enough and was my body good enough to be of interest to boys? Entering the next phase of my life and having sexual encounters that I wished, at the time, I hadn't, led to stage three of self sabotage. Lets just say the list went on and I had started to hold all this anger inside my body for all these things. I resented my body!
Having children was the next chapter in my life and surprise, surprise there was not a welcoming environment to conceive a child. So what do you think I did? Yep, held my body accountable and stage four of self sabotage was added to the growing list. Thanks to the NHS and some alternative therapies, I was able to go on to have two beautiful, happy and healthy children, which is surprising given the amount of hated and anger I was holding inside.
It was later on in my journey of self healing and my journey of yoga that I realised what I had been doing (no wonder I got ill). I started to learn about the energy centres in the body and how to let s@%t go. It was amazing, I could literally feel myself sighing out negativity and making a huge shift in my perspective. I started to use my practice to engage with my body, to acknowledge how it was feeling and give it thanks for giving me the ability to practice everyday. Which Is why I talk so much about gratitude and reminding yourself to be grateful to your body. With every exhale I felt my flexibility increase and my strength inside and out grow.
I went out and invested in books and courses on the history behind a woman's menstrual cycle, as I believed this is where my problem started and I needed to get to the bottom of it. I learnt about how amazing the cycle is, how it is not something to be ashamed of and how amazing our bodies are. I read about bleeding into the earth and dancing naked under the full moon. I know, sounds like I may have gone a bit crazy, but oh my god it revolutionised my relationship with my body. I finally became proud of every part of my body and realised I could harness this amazing new sexual energy I had created, to help me manifest my dreams and heighten my sex life. (I will go into this more in another blog, but let me tell you how amazing it so to combine your desires with your sexual energy!!!)
Let's get back to you...............
Your body has been like a sponge, it doesn't matter who you are, where you are from or if you are male or female. I promise you, you have allocated memories into your body and blamed yourself for past experiences. People that have suffered with sexual or mental abuse, anorexia, infertility, physical injury or illness....the list goes on! Whatever your story is, you have made your body accountable. Now is the time to reclaim your body, love it, look after it, feel sexy in your skin and
show the world how proud you are of it!
I took this photo when I went through my period of transformation and started to feel proud. I wasn't focused on the curves or how skinny I was, I felt I wanted to finally stand out and scream from the rooftops, this is my body and I LOVE IT!
Reclaim your bodies lovely people and scream it out with me.